Confession

Have been debating whether to write about this but as it seems to be consuming so much of my focus and effort at the moment I've decided to go ahead and do so.

It's quite simple really, after being one of those skinny bitches right up until my late 20s it was with great shock that I found myself putting on weight, so much so I didn't even realise it was happening for the first number of kilos!  I'm serious.  A few weeks ago (2 and 6 days to be precise) and 8 years and 30kg later I finally decided to do something about it (again) and joined up with the local Weight Watchers group.

2002

I'm not sure if it's a true confession without relinquishing control of all details so let me tell you exactly where I'm coming from - 93.7kg (or "ninety three point f***ing seven" as I snarled to a group of girlfriends after my first weigh-in).  Pardon mon Francais but it is seriously gutting to hear a number you didn't think your weight abacus went up to!

I have to say though, as depressing as that first step onto the scales is, it's also a relief as you realise you're finally doing something about it.  So every Tuesday at 5:45pm I trundle off to my weigh-in and make myself sit there for the mind-numbing meeting afterwards (I use the time to reflect on what I've done during the week to give me the good/bad result and it stops me from rushing off after the scales and celebrating/commiserating with food).  And without being too trite, there is something to be said for the camaraderie of bulge battling.

Of course I'm rewarding myself handsomely for this latest bout of self control & focus and have set myself lots of little goals along the way with fabulous rewards (which of course get better as I get closer to my goal weight).  My first was to get under 90kg which I did at weigh-in last Tuesday so I bought myself that pair of red Pip Duck boots I was lusting after here .  There I am gardening, wait, taking a break from the gardening (complete with flanny and peculiar camera smile??), in them yesterday.  Why include the current pic when it is such a departure from my former self?  It's part of the healing I'm sure ;)

SO, each Tuesday, you'll be treated subjected to my weigh-in ecstasy or hysteria (depending on whether I lose or gain) as I slog towards my ultimate goal of reaching 63.7kg.

I do realise this has been a VERY self indulgent post but then isn't that what most blogs are full of.  They're allowed to be, their ours.

Nicolex